When we differentiate we judge.
Any opinion we have is a judgement. We decide what is positive or negative in the world around us, all the time.
But no two people have the exact same preferences about absolutely everything. Everyone sees and experiences reality differently, therefore we all make our own unique judgements about the world.
This isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It makes life interesting that we all have different likes and dislikes.
However, passing such general ‘black and white’ judgements about everything can limit our life experience.
Just think; every time it rains you say,‘Oh, isn’t the weather bad!’ – you do this when it rains, and you comment how how ‘good’ the weather is when it doesn’t rain.
But what’s so terrible about rain? Trees and planets need it. It creates our rivers and oceans. We literally need it to sustain life.
So, why do we have this need to put rain, and other aspects of reality, in the ‘bad’ box of opinions or judgements within our minds?
It seems a shame to structure your life around not enjoying things, and actively avoiding them and feeling negative when they occur, especially things like rain, which you cannot control.
We form opinions about the world so that we can understand it better, so that we can function and process events which happen to us.
Although, if you have so many strong opinions about the world around you, that it depresses your mood, or stops you from doing certain activities at certain times, then you’re missing out on a lot of life.
It’s easy to let our thoughts about things take over our decision making, but what if we slowed down before remarking on the weather? What if we slowed down before labelling anything?
I’m sure if you take a breath before you say something is bad or negative, you will see that more often than not, it just ‘is’. It is just an event or object that is just happening nd you are just witnessing it.
Letting something outside of yourself, even something as everyday like the weather, cause you to complain and grumble, or worse, get annoyed, upset or angry, is letting yourself build up walls of protection and judgement all around you, and you miss what’s really there.
Being able to recognise this behaviour is great because it gets you to really take a look at how we interact with others.
Stop and think about how many times you’ve needlessly spoken about the weather with another person? How many times has is been a huge part of the ‘small talk’ you engage in? And for what? Are you any better off because of it?
It may have been a lovely conversation, but you added in a complaint or judgement which never needed to be there.
Practising relaxing when you feel yourself about to make a judgement about something is an easy way to give yourself a gap between the experience and your reaction.
You get to decide when and how you react to everything which happens. There’s never any rush, so take your time, and think about how whatever is happening is maybe not negative, maybe it’s positive, or maybe it doesn’t even have to affect you. You decide.
The less you pass judgements, or form opinions, create likes and dislikes for yourself, the more space and freedom you’ll have to openly experience the world. You now won’t hold back from doing something because you had a perceived ‘bad’ experience of it in the past.
Remember; you are allowed to change your mind. Things you decided not to like as child might be things you love as an adult.
So, be open and don’t get caught up in your opinions. Let yourself be free to experience without judgements, and never sell yourself short by labelling life.